Hey this free advice thing is catching on!
Here’s another letter from a hopeful. As the Reverend says, “Keep hope….ALIVE!”
What is the proper way to follow-up with a gent after a nice date? Should a lady reach out to him (either by phone or email) and thank him or should she wait to hear from him?
If you have a nice time on a date you most certainly should follow up to say thank you. The part that requires critical thinking is how and how you communicate. For starters, it is not okay to text a thank you, no matter how many times you may have texted your date in the past. Texting is so common and easy to misinterpret that its irrelevant – if you really had a good time and you really want to see the guy again, doesn’t he merit a response that shows him you mean it when you say you want to see him again? Email is a better option, and calling is even better. The more important point is when.
Please do not text a date for a thank you as you are speeding away from the date in a cab. No matter how fun and exciting your date was, texting is the lowest class way to communicate. Feh!
Wait until the next morning and compose a nice, short thank you that stays on point and brings up one element from your conversation of the night before. Such as, “Subject: Thank you. Body: Hi <date>, I really enjoyed our coffee yesterday and hope we get together again soon. Good luck with your work trip to LA. Best, <your name>”
If you call on the phone and get voicemail, your message can be as simple as the one I wrote above. If he picks up the phone, you can say, “I just want to say thank you for yesterday, which was really fun.” Let him do the rest of the talking. Then hang up and move on. If he wants to see you again and he’s a mensch, he should indicate that during this call. If he doesn’t indicate, you have my permission to move on immediately.